#the two biggest idiots ever
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oshikiri-toru · 6 months ago
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Thinking about streamer/YouTuber/etc Soap and boyfriend Ghost who is always in the background, but not in the way you think.
Ghost thinks it's funny as fuck to stand in the closet, door just slightly cracked, and stare at the camera while Soap is doing something. When Soap leaves to go to the bathroom, Ghost is standing ominously in the corner only to disappear once Soap stands in front of the camera to sit down. Soap vlogging/going live, walking around the city or something, and keeps turning the camera to see Ghost sitting at a table staring or hiding in an alley. He's always just in frame, always staring with his balaclava on, but never speaks, maybe even refuses to blink.
Soap's fans are terrified. It doesn't happen every stream/video, but just enough to gain attention. People are constantly asking about it; they type all concerned in the chat, only for Soap to insist he doesn't see anything. He'll check the place everyone told him to go just for Ghost to have disappeared. It gets so big that people are watching him just to find Ghost like a fucked up game of Where's Waldo. Some people take it more seriously, asking him to move because he has a stalker or telling him to bring in an exorcist.
Of course, Soap always tells them they're idiots and continues as normal. Behind the scenes, he's laughing his ass off because everyone thinks his boyfriend is actually a ghost haunting him. Ghost loves it because he likes feeling like a cryptid for Soap's online fans and gets to establish himself in Soap's life without needing to really make himself known.
One day a photo gets leaked (maybe by them, maybe not) of Ghost being normal with Soap, the two of them smiling with their arms around each other, maybe even a wedding photo, and people go nuts. Soap just refused to acknowledge his weird ass boyfriend in the back of his videos for years, like the chaotic asshole he is.
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ednacrabapple · 3 months ago
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I really love how stupid Nadja and Nandor are when they’re together
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clairexleon · 2 years ago
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avarii · 2 months ago
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"In death, sacrifice." Stuck in the Fade, Rook chooses a different path than the one laid out for her, whether Solas wanted her to or not.
Unfortunately for them both, her oath as a Grey Warden provides an unforseen problem to their prison stay.
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ryanthel0ser · 1 year ago
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Nero to Kyrie: I know your family has always taken care of me as one of their own but still...I wish I had some kind of blood relative just to know where I came from
Dante: hey kid
Nero: ...i take it back i take it back right now
Vergil: ...nero
Nero: CAN I MAKE A RETURN IT WAS BETTER NOT KNOWING PLEASE CAN I TAKE IT BACK
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screamting · 4 months ago
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another another fic prompt
Luffy and Zoro have a huge argument. I don't know about what or when, probably early on in their adventure, right? (Like, a separate one to the Ussop leaves the crew and the strawhats can't immediatley take him back before he really, honestly apologized). I'm curious with what you can come up with 👀
"That's a weird bird," Luffy says, holding onto his hat as he bends down to look at the weird bird.
"Wha," Zoro begins to say. "That's not a bird."
Luffy points at the weird bird. "Yeah it is. It's got a beak right there."
"It's fuzzy," Zoro said.
"Baby birds are fuzzy," Luffy told him. Overhearing from a little ways away and having become an expert on birds after staying with a lot of them for a year, Chopper trotted over to join them.
"Ohmigosh," Chopper said. "What's wrong with its wings?"
Aware he was a schmuck for even engaging, Usopp ventured over to see what this hairy, wingless baby bird looked like.
"...I don't think that's a bird," Usopp said.
"Then what is it?" Luffy asked.
"Hm. Chupacabra?" Usopp suggested.
"It is not a chupacabra," Zoro said.
("What's a chupacabra?" Chopper asked.
"It's a kind of land fish that sucks peoples souls out of their bodies with their huge lips," Usopp said, making a 'chu, chu' kissy face.
"OoUAAAGUGHGHH??" Chopper replied, running back to Jinbei, who was, at the moment, the closest tall person who might protect Chopper's soul from being sucked out by a mysterious fish.)
"What do you think it is, then?" both Usopp and Luffy asked, looking equally sure of their own assertions.
"It's a, um," Zoro looked down at it again. He had forgotten the word for the weird water dogs that weren't kappas and loved rocks. "Oversized chipmunk."
Even Luffy looked deeply unimpressed at that.
"It has a tail," Luffy said.
"It doesn't have cheeks," added Usopp.
"Whatever," Zoro said, "It's not a bird or a chuppa. So you're no more right than me."
"Robin!" Luffy turned to yell to the far side of the shore. "We found a weird soul sucking bird chipmunk fish!"
Robin has never moved faster in her life.
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sparatus · 7 days ago
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the reason they disappeared abrudas from evolution after 5 pages of screentime and without even an on-page fate is cause they knew the plot only works if both desolas and harper grab the idiot ball like a terrier with a squeaky toy, and they knew abrudas was too powerful and would avert the plot entirely by telling desolas he's being stupid and also killing harper and co with her bare hands
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lionblaze03-2 · 1 year ago
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Happy four year adoptiversary to my handsome little boy Montgomery Montgomery Python!!!
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Got him august 11th 2019 in lieu of my 16th birthday three days later. I’m turning 20 now. I cannot BELIEVE I’ve had this stupid little rascal for four entire years it does NOT feel like it. Hobbies include hiding in my computer, staring at nothing, and trying to escape his glass prison in the dark. I love him
#Named after montgomery x2 from a series of unfortunate events. And ALSO the Monty python pun#I just call him Monty that’s his actual name but his full name is both Montgomery’s + python + our actual last name for anyone who knows us#But on here? Python is his last name. Not doxxing us via the snake lmfao#He’s so stupid this asshole escaped one time and we literally found him the next morning#Yknow how most reptiles go missing for months if they escape. If they’re ever even found#ONE. NIGHT.#We heard a horrible THUD the next morning and came in on him laying on the floor like he’d fallen off the curtains#Actual fucking idiot boy I love him so much#Actually do not know his gender. He’s either had some weird urates or he’s actually a girl#So. Easy solution my snake is genderfluid just like me. Fuck it#BUT. He’s rather small for being four whole years old so he’s either a wimpy female or average male with weird slug-like piss#(Slugs being. Nonfertilized eggs)#3 is their ‘adult’ age for the record but they grow literally forever just extremely slowly#The first three years are BIG growth. He went from 10 inches to 3 feet in like under two years#Then they slow down#For anyone curious Hes in a 75 gallon tank. Prettymuch the biggest thing you can get commercially before you say#‘Fuck it!’ And just build your own. Which was the plan until we got lucky on craigslist#If he ever can’t stretch all the way tho. We’ll HAVE to build him another one. I want that man cozy damn it#Love this stupid fucking snake#ball python#snake#reptile#python#classic ball python#normal ball python
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ultimatebottom69 · 1 year ago
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...If i tell you all IRL that my step-mother actually made jokes about my lityle brother huge balls when he was birthed and how she was extremely graphic about how early on in the pregnancy every doctor and X-ray graphic showed it so she felt forced to do another kid to have a daughter.
Would you believe me ?
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I can't I can't I can't I can't
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quimichi · 5 months ago
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₊❏❜ ⋮ AJAW IS YOUR BESTIE & KINICH HAS A CRUSH ON YOU ⌒ pt.2 ◇, 3. ◇
□ Ajaw is obviously difficult to deal with lol. So the fact that he is somehow in some way nice to you is basically a miracle
■ No one knows what caught his attention and why he's in a way nicer to you than others he just is. And lemme tell you, being bestie with the pixilated flying attitude is fun
□ he's always around Kinich so you bet your always around Kinich too. Sometimes he just leaves Ajaw at your place lol like pls babysit this thing-
■ Ajaw is an asshole but he's not an asshole asshole yk? He is more than just aware of Kinichs crush on you and he does tease him a lot about it. Makes comments and all that stuff. You would immediately get it tho if you're not dense
□ he's using his knowledge about you and tells Kinich. Kinda wants you two together a lot cause--you're his bestie and being with you all the time would be better than with Kinich 💀
■ "You friendless idiot I told you they liked the crackers! Are you so dense that you ignore my perfect advise?! I could woo a leaf up better than you another human being!"
"The only thing you 'wooed' up are punches from everyone you encounter."
□ bestie is not afraid to throw shade around lol. Yes he wants you and Kinich together but he wants to make him look like the biggest idiot ever-and himself obviously the best thing you will ever have in your life. Ego to 100
■ "Y/n-! Did you know, that when Kinich has a hard time falling asleep he thinks of you and jer--KINICH WHAAA YOU ASSHO--!"
"Sorry about that, he's in a rather bad mood today. Don't worry about it."
□ "Just go and talk to them! They're really nice and likable, unlike you."
"It's not as easy as you think."
"Whats the hard part huh? Walking over or speaking, cause I know you look stupid doing both."
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unabletonotlovesatoru · 1 month ago
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⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ teddy’s notes: gahh loser girlies unite!! part two of my bakugou x loser reader headcanons <33 no warnings, just stupid fluff, enjoy!!
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bakugou, whose heart is ready to burst out of his chest whenever he sees the way your eyes light up the sight of him. “hey, loser” he’d mutter from behind you to get your attention or send you a subtle nod from across the room, and there you are: your naturally pouty lips splitting into a blinding smile across your pretty face and your eyes glimmering with joy as you abandon whatever you were doing to run up to him. you don’t attempt to hug him or anything though, not in public at least, a little wary of making him uncomfortable, but if katsuki is the one offering a hug, his expression still one of mild, faux annoyance, you immediately burrow your face into his chest and sigh happily, and bakugou wonders if he’ll ever get tired of feeling so wanted.
bakugou, who uses the nickname “loser” fully as a term of endearment without even realising it, unquestioning of the fact that you aren’t bothered by that. he also likes to call you a “crybaby”because that’s what you are, clicking his tongue at you whenever you bite your bottom lip roughly — a failed attempt to calm yourself down. however, if anyone dares to call you any of those or even bully? they’re dead: face to face with katsuki’s wrath as his palms crackle with explosions going off and he lunges forward.
bakugou, who is lucky to have you as his biggest supporter. your big eyes never leave his figure whenever there is any competition or just a little quarrel, shouting a determined and very out of character “yeah!” after bakugou threatens to ‘paint the wall’ with someone. everyone’s head turns to you in confusion, to which you just shrug and cower into yourself, mumbling something along the lines of “what? he’s my boyfriend :(”. katsuki’s smirk widens and he sends you a wink, enjoying the sight of you being a sputtering mess before he moves on.
bakugou, who wonders how you can be so stupid sometimes, his hand landing on the back of your head sharply whenever something utterly ridiculous comes out of your mouth. doesn’t even have any desire to scream at you, just mumbling curses in disappointment which makes you giggle, small hand covering your mouth to hide the sounds from him, but as soon as his head snaps to look at you you turn away to the opposite side. “tch, idiot” “huh? katsuki, don’t leave!”.
bakugou, who thinks your lips are very kissable. whatever you do to them always makes them look so pretty, so attractive with how the gloss makes them plumper and he catches himself staring at them a bit too long, snapping his head away with a snarl when you manage to catch him too. he imagines kissing you a lot more than he should, daydreaming about it at random times and wondering if the heat creeping up into his cheeks is visible, but you don’t seem to notice it. it’s another story when you are the one staring at him and he is an attentive little shit so of course he sees and teases you about it.
+ bonus!
and if you’re feeling courageous and get back at him, somehow, i can only see this meme;
“you should be addicted to shutting the fuck up.” he growls at you, leaning in dangerously close, but you seem careless, a cheeky grin spread on your lips as you laugh,
“hah! you wanna kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid.”
a dangerous smirk splits across his face, “so what if i do?”
you try to run away, but the key word is ‘try’.
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awritersrejections · 9 months ago
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via @lastcellontheleft
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Taste is housed in parts of the mind that precedes pity. Pity has no place at the table.
S02E12 "Tome-wan"
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luv-lock · 1 month ago
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𓈒ㅤׂㅤ 𓇼 ࣪ ʏ ᴏ ᴜ ɴ ɢ ʟ ᴏ ᴠ ᴇ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒⠀
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Pairing: Robins x Fem Reader
Headcanon: How would they be as your boyfriend?
Characters: Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Damian Wayne.
Note: English is not my first language. Hope you enjoy!
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:¨ ·.· ¨:⠀ ㅤ Dick Grayson   ׅ      ♡ 𝄒!
Affection Overload: Dick is all about physical affection. Hugs, kisses, holding hands—he’s constantly touching you. If you’re in public, expect him to have an arm around your waist or your hand in his at all times.
Grand Gestures: He loves making big romantic statements. Random flowers delivered to your class? Check. Swinging into your bedroom window just to say goodnight? Double check.
Jealousy Level: Surprisingly chill, but only because he’s confident. If someone flirts with you, he’ll swoop in with a smug smile and casually remind them that you’re his.
Protective Side: He’s sweet and easygoing most of the time, but the second he thinks you’re in danger, he turns into serious protector mode. He’s not above scaring people off if necessary.
Clingy but Cute: He hates being away from you. Even if you’re just apart for a day, he’ll text or call constantly. "Miss me yet? Because I miss you."
The Cheerleader Boyfriend: Dick is your biggest fan. Whether you’re pursuing a hobby, trying something new, or just having a bad day, he’s there hyping you up like, “You’re amazing, don’t forget that.”
Drama King: If you ever fight, expect him to show up at your door with flowers, chocolates, and the saddest puppy-dog eyes you’ve ever seen. He cannot stand the idea of you being upset with him.
:¨ ·.· ¨:⠀ ㅤ Jason Todd   ׅ      ♡ 𝄒!
Acts Tough but Is a Softie: Jason tries to play it cool, but deep down, he’s so soft for you. You’ll catch him staring at you like you hung the moon, and he’ll deny it every time.
Overprotective: Jason is feral when it comes to your safety. If anyone so much as looks at you the wrong way, he’s ready to throw hands. “You okay, babe? Need me to deal with them?”
Big on Small Gestures: He’s not a grand-gesture kind of guy, but he’ll quietly leave your favorite snacks on your desk or slip a note into your bag that says, "Have a good day, idiot."
Jealousy Level: Off the charts. Jason tries to play it cool, but the second someone flirts with you, his hand is on your waist, and his glare is lethal.
Supportive but Real: Jason is your rock. He’ll always be there for you, but he’s not afraid to call you out if he thinks you’re being too hard on yourself. “Stop beating yourself up. You’re amazing. End of story.”
Loves Quiet Time Together: He’s happiest when it’s just the two of you curled up on the couch, watching movies or reading. Those moments mean the world to him.
Secretly Romantic: Jason pretends he’s not into cheesy romance, but he’ll randomly do something that makes your heart melt, like showing up with a book he thought you’d like or quoting poetry at the most unexpected times.
:¨ ·.· ¨:⠀ ㅤ Damian Wayne   ׅ      ♡ 𝄒!
Awkwardly Affectionate: Damian isn’t great at expressing his feelings verbally, so his affection comes in the form of small, thoughtful actions. He’ll make sure your tea is brewed perfectly or bring you handmade gifts.
Possessive but Polite: Damian hates sharing your attention. If someone flirts with you, he’ll politely (but firmly) remind them who you belong to. “I believe you’re wasting your time. She’s spoken for.”
Jealousy Level: High but controlled. Instead of losing his temper, he’ll subtly outshine whoever is trying to steal your attention. “Ah, yes, you’ve met my girlfriend. Isn’t she magnificent?”
Protective in a Subtle Way: He’s not loud about it, but Damian is always watching out for you. If someone wrongs you, he’ll handle it quietly and efficiently. “You’ll find they’re no longer a problem.”
Always Wants to Impress You: Damian is constantly trying to prove himself to you, whether it’s through his art, his fighting skills, or his intellect. He’s desperate for your approval, even if he pretends he’s not.
Secretly Vulnerable: Behind his confident exterior, Damian is terrified of losing you. He doesn’t know how to handle those emotions, so he’ll sometimes withdraw until you reassure him.
Over-the-Top Romantic in Private: When it’s just the two of you, Damian lets his walls down. He’ll read you poetry, kiss your hand, and whisper how much you mean to him.
How They’re Similar:
All of them are incredibly protective of you and hate seeing you hurt or upset.
They’re obsessed with making you happy and will go out of their way to ensure you feel loved.
Whether they’re soft and sweet or intense and dramatic, they all love you with their whole heart—and they’re not afraid to show it.
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𝒍𝒖𝒗-𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌 ☆ 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒄𝒐𝒑𝒚, 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒔𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒐𝒓 𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒚 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒐𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒆𝒃𝒔𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒔.
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jamespotterismydaddy · 1 year ago
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Capture the Flag
luke castellan x reader
pt 2
A/N: now that i'm writing for other fandoms, feel free to let me know if you only want to be on a hotd taglist. But now, please enjoy the strongest swordsman in camp halfblood
TW: MAJOR SMUT, slight bondage, rough smut, violence, lowkey dark(ish)!luke
word count: 1,699 words
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You want Luke Castellan’s head speared on your sword.
It’s like you spend every minute preparing for capture the flag because of him. He spends every last minute of each game cutting down your teammates and stealing your flag, so now it’s time to change the tactic. You ditch your father’s usual battle advice of going for the kill and hope that defence is the best offence for once. You also pray that he will guide your sword anyhow. So there you stand, guarding your flag with two of your most vicious teammates. You dodge the blue team’s first attack that was supposed to draw you off. You may have a short temper but you aren’t stupid. And you’re more than pleased to see the look of surprise on Luke’s face as he approaches.
“Fucking Ares kids.” He grumbles, sword drawn.
“Were you not expecting me, Castellan?” You ask with a vengeful smirk.
He goes right for you. You’re the biggest threat there but he likes to think you’re not even close to his skill level. You would believe that the man plans to cut you down and then your teammates. He always aims for the glory of it all.
“How’s your team gonna get our flag if you’re here?” He asks as he makes the first swing. It’s much better to start off on offence and he’s the one coming at you.
“Who cares. When you’re done, so is your team.” You block him, hating to be on defence but he’s too quick.
“Gods, you didn’t plan ahead of that? There really isn’t anything in that pretty little head of yours, is there? Other than rage of course.”
  You’re a hothead. He knows it. You know it and it doesn’t take much to rile you up. When you’re riled up, you get sloppy. At this point, you don’t care if he guts you, you go for the little fucker’s ankles. You’re actually surprised when he stumbles from blocking your attack. It’s a stupid mistake, especially for him. Though, you aren’t going to let a chance like this slip by. You keep pushing him back, trying to leave him no chance to think in between swings. He trips over a log behind him, the sword falling from his hand. He has no chance now, not on the ground and you won’t be letting him get up.
“Who’s the idiot now?” 
He looks at you as you approach slowly, taunting him. He then grabs his sword and makes a break for it. You’re too shocked to even keep him down.
What the fuck.
You don’t think you’ve ever seen Luke Castellan run from a fight. Not in your 4 years at camp. So you chase after him.
He’s fast, faster than you but you push yourself. He trails away… and away. Then you lose him. 
“Godsdamnit!” You scream into the woods as you jog around where you last saw him. 
You know you can’t stray for long if you’re not fighting Luke so you turn to make your way back to the flag. That’s when he jumps out at you with his sword swinging. You barely have time to block and it puts you off your balance. He swings at you again and again. You fall as you continue to block the merciless strikes. You’re practically holding your sword in the air and hoping for the best. The best doesn’t come as the weapon flies from your hand. He descends on you, straddling your waist as he holds the blade to your throat. He’s smirking.
“You don’t try nearly hard enough.” He says to you. “I know you’re not very clever but hades, my teammates probably already have the flag over the barrier.” 
That’s when you realize how easily you were deceived. Luke didn’t run from you because you bested him; he ran to draw you off. It was a pathetically simple plan and it worked. The heat rises to your cheeks from humiliation. He grabs your two hands and pins them above your head, his grip gentle but also firm.
“I’ll put you in your grave.” You spit out at him.
“Will you now? While I have you essentially restrained?” He’s clearly amused.
You struggle beneath him with all your force but all you manage to do is roll your hips against him, earning a groan from the man. You feel it too, the burning ache between your thighs. You want him. Worse yet, he wants you.
“Let me up.” 
“No. I think you quite like how I have you pinned to the ground.” He smirks.
“You’re delusional.”
“You’re wet.”
He slips a knee between your thighs and rubs it against your clothed pussy. It takes everything in you not to whimper.
“S-Stop.” You stutter out.
“Make me.” He murmurs, continuing to make you grind down on his knee as he leans down and forces you into a hot kiss. You hate how you kiss back, so hungry for him. Your mind is clouded with lust for a moment before you realize the advantage he is giving you. You never technically conceded.
As swiftly as you can, you wrap your free leg around his waist and use your whole strength to throw him off you, startling him enough to free your hands.
“You bitch.” He groans as you jab him in the stomach to try and give yourself enough time to grab your sword but it doesn’t work. He grabs you by the ankle and yanks hard. You slam to the ground right on your stomach. He moves to restrain you by sitting on your thighs so you can’t move your legs and holds your hands behind your back. You clearly didn’t consider how inevitably stronger he is than you.
“Shit.” You whine. His hold isn’t nearly as gentle this time.
“That was a cheap fucking shot.” He says cruelly. He’s pissed now.
“Fuck you. Castellan!” Gods it goes straight to his dick when you call him by his last name. He grips your hair with his free hand and pulls back hard so you have to look at him. You whine again at the sharp pain.
“You just can’t play fair, can you, princess? Maybe I won’t either then.”
 He drops your head and you hear him rustling with something. You realize it’s his belt when you feel the leather against your wrists. He’s binding you.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Your voice is full of rage but to him, you just sound petulant. 
 “What you need.” Is his simple answer.
He shifts down so he sits, or rather kneels, with your legs between his. He’s amused by your renewed writhing as an attempt to escape. It is pitiful really. Oh well, he’ll have you writhing for a different reason soon enough.
His fingertips glide across your waist, to your hips and then to your thighs, causing your back to arch upwards slightly, your stomach dipping. He brings his lips down to your ear, his voice is deep and lustful as he says, “Your body seems to know what it wants.”
“I’ll kill you.” You promise.
“Oh, i’m sure you will. But right now, you fucking belong to me.” He yanks on your hair again so you have to look at him and your eyes water from the pain. “I think you like me hurting you.” His other hand slips between your thighs to rub your clit and you let out a strangled moan. “For a girl who is so controlling, it’s interesting how badly you enjoy me manhandling you.”
He yanks your pants down and slips your helmet under your hips so your ass stays high in the air with your chest to the ground.
“This is fucked up.” You say.
“You love it. Your panties are soaked.” And he’s completely right. You’ve never been so turned on before but not a lot of men are as strong and good-looking as Luke Castellan.
He pulls your panties down and groans at the sight of your dripping pussy. He begins to palm himself through his pants and unzips them. “You have about three seconds to tell me if you don’t actually want this.”
You are silent and he chuckles. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.” 
Before you can even prepare yourself or form a thought, his fat cock is shoved inside of you, splitting you open.
“Ah, Luke!” You moan at the pain and pleasure.
“Gods, this is the tightest little pussy i’ve had.” He begins to fuck in and out of you relentlessly, giving you no time to adjust. “Yeah, you’re good for me now, baby. Such a good little cocksleeve.” He punctuates his last words with hard thrusts, the head of his cock bullying into you each time.
All you can do is repeat his name like a mantra as you get pounded on the forest floor by the strongest swordsman in camp. It’s even worse as he begins to rub your clit again, sending you so close to the edge.
“Never gonna have enough of you after this.” Luke murmurs as he feels you squeezing around him. “My good girl.” 
That’s what sends you tumbling over the edge, bringing Luke with you as you do. He never could’ve kept going, not with the way your walls were squeezing around him. He pulls out almost instantly so he can watch his cum spill out of you. He doesn’t wipe it. He just pulls your panties back on and fixes the both of you up. You’re thoroughly spent, he can tell by the way you pant as he releases your wrists.
“You okay?” He asks as he helps you sit up. He grabs your hands so he can kiss the marks on your wrists. After all you’ve done, that’s the act that makes you blush furiously. 
“Um, yeah.” You breathe out.
“I’ll be nicer next time, I promise. Somebody just had to put you in your place first.” He grins wolfishly.
“Next time?” 
That’s when you hear the horn. The blue team has won again.
He pecks a kiss to your cheek. “Time to claim my kleos.” He says cockily before jogging off to meet his team.
taglist (comment to be added):General: @valeskafics @urmomsgirlfriend1 @girlwith-thepearlearring @darylandbethfanforever9 @lovellies @juhdoche @papichulo120627 @watercolorskyy @ophelialaufey @aerangi
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cumironi · 6 months ago
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TILL FOREVER FALLS APART
when you first joined jujutsu high, you probably never imagined being in relationships with two of the strongest special grade sorcerers. yet here you are, destined to spend the rest of your life with them. did you complain about it? absolutely not. this is simply the story of your life being in relationships with geto suguru and gojo satoru.
warning : age-up! satosugu, spoiled! fem reader, fluff, heavy / light angst, dark content, trauma mentioned, unprotected sex, threesome, overstimulated, suggestive, oral sex ( m & f receiving ), dirty talk, degrading, name-calling, pet names, poly relationship, anxiety, lots more.
[☆] : NSFW | REQUESTS ARE OPEN!
🖇️ YOU WILL BE BLOCKED! IF YOU'RE SPAMMING LIKE WITHOUT REBLOGGING!
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☆ PRE RELATIONSHIP :
GENTLE LOVE
“loving you is the easiest thing,” he murmured against your skin, his voice low and comforting, as if he was sharing a secret meant only for you.
COLD ICE POPSICLE! ( ☆ )
satoru gojo, suguru geto, you and your friends sit in the back of the school building, smoking and talking, joint in hands. it was summer and heat waves swimming around freely, you eating some ice cream, licking and slurping while your eyes focus on your two friends, who knows that might not be the only thing you lick that day.
YOU WILL GO DOWN IN HISTORY AS THE WORLDS BIGGEST IDIOT
the first time you meet your senior, and you think they are the weirdest and most idiots person you've ever met, especially that special-albino looking kid, gojo satoru.
FALL APART? NAH, JUST MENTAL BREAKDOWN
gojo found you training in the middle of the night only for you to have a mental breakdown in front of him. so he brings you to geto's dorm room to calm you down, also for gojo to find behind geto's action on why he is so gentle with you.
☆ IN RELATIONSHIPS :
THE ONE WITH TWINS BOYFRIENDS
dating gojo and geto is always fun and games, but you know what's the most fun thing you could do with having two boyfriends? dressing them up like twins.
STARS AROUND SCARS
you were just trying to draw some stars on your boyfriend, not knowing simple things could be so hard when you have two needy boyfriends.
ALWAYS THE BRIDESMAID NEVER THE BRIDE (01) , (02) , (02.1)
the downfall of your relationship after suguru's moral compass went south.
THE ONE WITH THE PRANK
living with you is all fun and games. . . until you start pulling all of these harmless pranks on them.
CAN YOU HANDLE IT, BABY? ( ☆ )
you are sitting there in the living room, drowning under the tongue-tied make-out sessions before your other boyfriends walk in, happily watching the two of you while touching himself.
GOOD GIRL GO TO HEAVEN ( ☆ )
after a long day of assembling a lot of furniture and decorating your new house, they decided they want to test drive the new bed with you.
HUNTER GOJO
you and your two boyfriends just moved in together and decided to go shopping for some furniture and other stuff, and gojo satoru? he has another purpose: hunting for a perfect bed for sex and humiliated you. [ soon ]
TUTORIAL : HOW TO GET IGNORE BY YOUR GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE YOU'RE PISSING HER OFF WHEN SHE'S ON HER PERIOD BY GOJO SATORU.
you are on your second day of your period. your mood is bad, your stomach is killing you, and your boyfriend? he's an asshole who can't stop teasing you and makes you cry. [soon]
SLIPPING THROUGH MY FINGERS
it's been years since the hidden inventory incident, you and your two boyfriends already graduate and are working for jujutsu. . . but nobody knows your struggling, nobody knows how you're the only one who's stuck in 2006 while everybody moves on, not even your boyfriends, and when they do, it's already too late.
ONE TOO MANY
the first time you have an argument with your two boyfriends is because they've been ignoring you for weeks, so you return the favor.
SHUT UP, STOP IT! ( ☆ )
there is nothing better than make-up sex after you and your two lovely boyfriends, having an argument.
PAIN, SUFFERING AND JESUS
feeling like shit? feeling nauseous? you are having a fever? don't worry, your two amazing boyfriends are ready to take care of you!
HYPOTHETICALLY, UPS?!
you chuckle softly, your eyes twinkling with playful mischief. “hypothetically, you should propose to me properly,” you tease, enjoying the light-heartedness of the moment.
YOU AND YOUR INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS? 100 TIMES NEED A THERAPIST!
you and all of your disturbing intrusive thoughts definitely need a therapist because it scared the shit out of them.
IDIOTS AND SEAWEED
your two boyfriends got too protective over you, so what's better than to give them a little bit of seaweed and salt water?
HELP ME MAN!
you, their little girlfriend, scared the shit out of your boyfriends. they don't know why, how, them, the strongest jujutsu sorcerers in the modern world are scared of their girlfriend.
HIS TIP? IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY TIP!
you just got your nails done, and geto is the one who paid for it. so as your way to appreciate his gesture you decided to get your nails color with the same color of his tip, which results in gojo's relentless jealousy.
NOT FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES
do you know what tea could affect your relationship? making you have an argument with your boyfriends because you thought they were overprotective and overbearing.
FIVE AND ONE DIFFERENT WAYS TO SAY I LOVE YOU
your boyfriends are perfect in every sense, flawless in the ways that matter. they possess every one of the five love languages and master each one effortlessly. whether it’s the tender touch of reassurance, words that lift you higher, gifts that show how much they care, acts of service that make your life smoother, or simply being there when you need them, they never fail to make you feel cherished.
SCARS TO YOUR BEAUTIFUL
all scars and everything, you are still the most beautiful girl to your boyfriends. and they will always remind you, every single day until they leave no room for you to feel insecure.
SUGURUUUU, DO SOMETHING!
you and gojo are insufferable, especially when gojo decides he wants to be annoying and tries to get under your skin. you always come running to geto and telling him to do something about gojo.
( COMING SOON! )
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[ TAGLIST ] : OPEN
@junni-berry @fortunatelyfurrygiver @soraya-daydreams @diorzs @dancing--devils @iloveboysinred @holylonelyponyeatingmacaroni @cupcaketeddybehr @crocodilethesir @lemonnotade
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spideyjimin · 2 months ago
Text
✨ my all time favourites BTS fics ✨
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⟶ soo i've been really wanting to do this for a while already but i didn't really have the time to do it… soo here you have all the fics that I deeply loved & that i sometimes still read again 🫶🏼those fics are really amazing & thanks a lot to the writers for those masterpieces! 💞
sweet | ksj @oddinary4bts
⤷ Drabble of idol Jin coming back from the military and trying to sort out his situationship with the girl he left behind when he went into the military
idol!au, a bit of angst, fluff and smut
meraki | jjk @taegularities
⤷ Jungkook finds you irritating; far too energetic and insistent. But his perception of you changes bit by bit, minute by minute, when he's persuaded into spending an entire night with you at places he doesn't know.
e2l, grumpy!jk (+ photographer!jk) x sunshine!reader; fluff, smut
motherfuckin' train wreck | jjk @lovieku
⤷ when renowned fuckboy jeon jeongguk catches feelings, he loses his mind. only when it comes to you, though.
fwb au
new guy | knj @kithtaehyung
⤷ all you want to do is have a successful meeting after experiencing dwindling attendance, but the new guy is completing disrupting things... or is he?
smut ; university au ; enemies to lovers?
into it | pjm @xpeachesncream
⤷ helping your bestfriend out with his research project happens to come with more than what you bargained for. 
grad school au, idiots to lovers au, strangers to lovers au, angst, smut
bands | jjk @xpeachesncream
⤷ jeon jungkook has it all: the looks, the fame, the money, the women. being considered the sexiest man in the industry, he finds no complaints about the way his life is going nor does he find any reason to apologize for the way he approaches it. he is a force to be reckoned with - until he meets you. 
strip club/nightlife au, post grad au, fluff, angst, smut
lowkey | jjk @xpeachesncream
⤷ in order to pass organic chemistry and pay off your car damages from an accident, all you have to do is help the nerd, jeon jungkook, with a few things: pretend to be his girlfriend and teach him the ways of dating.
college au, fake dating au, friends to lovers au | fluff, angst, smut
saudade | kth @chateautae
⤷ a demanding idol lifestyle was something taehyung and yourself were all too familiar with. it wasn’t so hard when considering your unconditional love for one another, but lately, taehyung wasn’t the same anymore; and you decide it’s time to find out why.
angst, smut, fluff (the holy trinity), idol!au, established relationship!au
100 km/hour | pjm @chateautae
⤷ what exactly happens when you and your friends have to pile into one car for the ride home after an insane halloween party, and you find yourself sitting in park jimin’s lap? especially when he’s dressed as an angel, and you’re in the sluttiest devil costume ever?
college!au, smut, pwp
fine line | jjk @soobibabe
⤷ Y/N, a 28-year-old dreamer whose plans for marriage and motherhood crumbled when her fiancé, Jae-on, decided to "see other people," leaving her adrift in a sea of unfulfilled expectations. Just as she’s about to face the cringe of attending his baby shower with his new girlfriend, her best friend Jungkook swoops in with a wild idea; why not embark on a platonic co-parenting adventure together?
romance
hazy hours | myg @borathae
⤷ part of the kinkoctober 2024
new relationship!AU, Idol!Yoongi
fxck a fxckboy | myg @yoongifis
⤷ where you sort of hooked up with one of the school’s biggest fuckboys but end up leaving him hanging and never contacting him because…well…why not? somehow the universe brought you two together and now you’re left with dealing with him because he apparently caught feelings for you.
smut, pwp
before we shatter | jjk @caramelkoo
⤷ dating an idol is fun, they said. having a family with one is fun, they said. Until you're falling face forward because of your reality. A reality where Jungkook dreams of a future and a reality where your own future is collapsed.
established relationship, idol!jungkook
warm nighs & clear lines | jjk @awrkive
⤷ there haven't been a lot of people who have come into your life that became important to you – and you didn’t expect jeon jungkook to be one if it – not at all. but what started as a casual relationship turned into more than that, and now you find yourself deeply in love with him – and happily so.
or; your first "i love you" comes out completely wrong.
SMUT, fluff
all your fault | jhs @minisugakoobies
⤷ It’s all Hobi’s fault!
smut, drabble, PWP, established relationship, non-Idol!AU
muscle memory | knj @taegularities
⤷ the weather outside might be trying to chill you to your bones, but watching Namjoon's seething hot presence work out is enough to melt every little piece of you - and he sees the longing in your eyes all too soon.
establish relationship; some fluff, mostly smut
magic stick | jjk @badbtssmut
⤷ Jungkook is kinda sad because he has never been with a girl who could take him balls deep because of his size, reader doesn't believe him and she wants to see, but he tells her that he can't atm bc he's not hard. She is wearing this kinda halter top style with no bra so she looses the top and shows her tits to him and let's him touch them. After he's hard he shows her his dick and she says she's willing to try to take it all and she rides him into the sunset
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